|We need only look to our personal lives, but also to the news coming out from the United Kingdom, to understand celebrating and cherishing our loved ones while they’re here is so important.
It’s never easy to say goodbye to a dear relative or friend, but it’s also true that doing so gives us the opportunity to remember the best of them. Remembering a loved one is something that you’ll do for the rest of your love, but it can be nice to tokenise that in an appropriate way, too - curating a token to that.
This can also serve a purpose for you, also, in that you can find closure in saying goodbye the right way, especially if you didn’t get the chance to do so while they were here. In this post, we will provide six respectful and accessible means of remembering a departed loved one.
Please note: This collaborative article does not contain healthcare or therapeutic advice. If you are concerned about your health or well-being, speak with a health professional or visit your nearest medical facility in an emergency. The links in this article may be affiliate links that I will be compensated for at no additional cost to you.
Without further ado, please consider some of the following advice:
1. A Beautiful Grave Marker
A wonderful grave marker or death date scroll can be installed at their resting place (or anywhere else you consider it appropriate and is legal) is a nice way to mark your friend or relative and celebrate their life. It also informs passers-by of who is resting there so they can also be respectful.
A physical, robust and structurally secure marker such as this can provide a symbolic representation of your memory in the best way. In some cases, the person you wish to remember may even stipulate the design they’d like or sort this out beforehand, especially in their old age. This might sound morbid to some, but finding a lovely and suitable way to remember those we love can be a nice preparation to make as if curating a last will and testament.
2. Support In Their Name
Sometimes, people use the emotional experience of losing a loved one to inspire them to make a change or to support a cause they believed in. It’s not uncommon, for example, for those who lose friends to cancer before their time to begin fundraising for cancer research charities. Some even begin training to run a marathon or half-marathon, taking donations for such charities, which can also be a fantastic way to process grief - provided this doesn’t become an obsession to ignore your feelings.
Alternatively, perhaps donating a small portion of your inheritance to a cause they loved can do the work. It can also be nice to make sure that certain provisions helping with the final administrative tasks are supported. For example, if their cat is going to be cared for in a rescue shelter due to no nearby family member being able to take them on, then a donation to that non-profit could be worthwhile.
3. Reconnecting With Your Family & Friends
Now, it might not be that the passing of a loved one is enough to heal fractious family ties - which many people have and you shouldn’t feel ashamed about, even if you’re not thrilled about them.
Funeral planning can sometimes be a worthwhile time by which to invite friends or family members that you haven’t seen for some time, and to reconnect. It might be just what your relative had hoped for you. It can also be a good way to move on with worthwhile fellow feeling going forward after the fact. In the long run, it’s sure to create a sense of occasion and allows you to pay your respects in the most reliable manner.
4. Help Out With The Administrative Tasks
While it may be less of a symbolic task than attending a funeral, or donating to a cause in their name, or spreading your loved one’s ashes, it can also be that helping out with the administrative tasks, be that in your own family or someone elses, can be a worthwhile use of your time. It really does make a difference.
You can offer your assistance in a number of different ways. It might just be that you help your other relative go through their house and pick out the items worth keeping, the tokens they wished to pass down, and those that can be ethically disposed of or donated, perhaps even sold to match the costs of the funeral event.
Or, perhaps you’ll just drive people to and from the event, or help your friend plan the funeral because they had a small family. If you’re one of the only points of contact your lost friend had, then simply making sure some kind of event or memorial is put in place can be a nice way to pay your last respects. The administrative tasks are no mean feat, so make sure your planning fits with that schedule.
5. Just Take Some Time To Remember
So far, you may have the impression that you have to be ‘of use’ or plan out a set of tasks to complete in order to remember your loved one. Sometimes, just giving yourself the space to remember, as in real pursuit of itself, can be a nice thing to do.
Taking a weekend away with your partner, for example, to clear your head and perhaps even light a candle for them in a local religious building (if they were that way inclined), can be nice.
For some, taking time to write in their journal can make a big difference. Remember, though that there are no ‘correct’ emotions to feel sooner after, so you may wish to take this trip or to remember them now, or perhaps a year later, whenever is best for you.
6. Archive Some Of Your Shared Photographs & Tokens
When a loved one passes, all of the tokens you have of your time together become much more important to you, or rather, take on a new significance. For example - if your friend or relative purchase a necklace or a watch for you, then having this restored, cleaned or fixed can be a nice thing to do to preserve their memory.
The same goes for other items, like a recipe book they provided you, and perhaps printing and framing some of the photographs you’ve taken together - which may still be hosted on your social media page or saved in your cloud storage if you’re lucky.
If you can protect these, you’ll be protecting their memory, too. But don’t worry if you have little material like this, because simply being a person who remembers and respects those you’ve lost is token enough.
With this post, we hope you can remember a departed loved on in the best way.
The links on this page may be embedded with affiliate links that I am compensated for at no additional cost to you.
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